As a leader, your job isn’t to keep everyone comfortable—it’s to help them grow. “Try to increase your outreach this week” and “We’re implementing a daily outreach minimum and tracking it together at 4:30 PM” are not the same message. One is a suggestion. The other is a strong choice. Your team can feel the difference—and your results will show it.

Thanksgiving gives us rare space to notice the ‘teachers’ we never asked for—the tough economy, rising costs, AI disruption, election-year noise, even the hard no’s and risky yes’s. In this year’s reflection, Mary Ann, Managing Partner at Butler Street, shares how those unwelcome lessons reshaped her leadership, sharpened their focus, deepened gratitude for clients and teams, and turned ongoing discomfort into clarity, courage, and uncommon growth.

Before you rush to coach your team, consider the invisible barrier that often sabotages success: you. Many leaders assume that once they step into a coaching role, the hard work of self-evaluation is over. It isn’t. The best coaches begin by diagnosing their own game—how they respond under stress, mis-step in conversations, and hold themselves accountable. Only after you’ve coached yourself can you truly lead others.